Bringing Celebration to Leadership

Let’s talk about appreciation and celebration and why they matter.

We associate celebrating with things like birthday parties, weddings, and life events. We don’t associate celebrating with the appreciation of things in our daily lives.

Is that a weird suggestion for a leadership coach to make? Well, my assertion is that celebration and appreciation are even more important in leadership development.

Here’s why: We live in an achievement culture. Our culture prioritizes lots of really good results, tons of success – and all done as quickly and efficiently as possible. And while that isn't necessarily wrong, because results are a good thing and propels the earth forward, the consequence of achievement culture is that most of us spend our daily lives looking for what isn't working or what's wrong.

In other words, we're looking for the problems or the gaps that are keeping us from being as efficient, hard-working, and determined as possible to achieve our results as quickly as possible. And that has an impact on people.

I find that this mindset tends to lower people's morale, gives them imposter syndrome, and makes feel like they're not good enough. For others, it actually limits their participation in leadership overall, because in achievement culture, results have to look a certain way and are usually based on doing a ton of hard work. We feel like we have to be “the fixer” or the one who rises above the challenges we face.

The reason I’m explaining this is because I want to point out some of the flaws and consequences in our current system. The current system is all about looking for what's wrong or where the gap exists. The better system prioritizes celebration and appreciation.

What makes leadership impactful is when a different skillset is the priority. Real leadership takes different qualities just doing “whatever it takes” to produce something. Real leadership is about celebration and appreciation.

Celebration tends to be connected to birthdays and weddings because those events are tied to the innate parts of us. We have joy for the new relationship, the new union, the next year of life on the planet, the new birth, etc.

When you bring celebration to leadership, you are no longer looking at what’s wrong in the process or what gaps might be missing. Instead, we get to be fully seen. We get to acknowledge and appreciate every person – leaders and direct reports – for who they are in the world.

Here's the caveat: If you’re going to go out and practice celebrating with people, make sure that you don’t just celebrate what they’re doing. It’s not just about, “Hey, thanks for making those 10 cold calls” or “Thanks for closing that new deal” or “Thanks for running the meeting smoothly.” Instead, really focus on who they are being.

When it’s a person’s birthday, you might write “I hope you have another great year” in their birthday card. Or you might write a note of appreciation, like, “You are the kindest person on the planet. I am so grateful to have you as a friend” or “You are a courageous and brave and thoughtful mother.”

Consider using language like this when celebrating in your leadership role. Don’t just point to the things that people are doing as being great. Instead, point to who they are.

“I celebrate the charisma you bring.

“I celebrate that once you’re in the room, we are all filled with energy again.”

“I celebrate your courage and bravery and your willingness to say what needs to be said to move things along.”

Appreciation conversations need to happen everywhere in life. It’s also important to appreciate and celebrate ourselves.

I spent time at the beach, last week, because I acknowledged that I needed to appreciate where I am in life – going into month six of a pandemic as a small business owner. I’m celebrating the fact that I’m able to continue to serve and create the community that matters to me.

Can you appreciate yourself, right now? What’s going on in your life? Have you really sat down and celebrated and appreciated that?

Let me know what you’re celebrating, because I would love to acknowledge and celebrate alongside you.